Ashy

WEBVTT 1 00:00:03.359 --> 00:00:08.550 Welcome back to another episode of down to folk. Are you regretting our decision 2 00:00:08.589 --> 00:00:13.390 to move to weekly releases as much as we are? I won't waste your 3 00:00:13.429 --> 00:00:18.070 time will all of this small talk. There are so many stories to be 4 00:00:18.269 --> 00:00:24.539 told, allegedly, so perhaps we should start. But first some late breaking 5 00:00:24.579 --> 00:00:31.140 news. This podcast contains adult themes. shocker. If you are listening with 6 00:00:31.260 --> 00:00:36.450 children, it's too late. Sit Back, relax and enjoy the show. 7 00:00:41.649 --> 00:00:47.289 On the tiny island of Sicily lived a kind man and his kind daughter named 8 00:00:47.329 --> 00:00:52.159 Asha. The two loved each other very much and he would give her all 9 00:00:52.280 --> 00:00:57.520 manner treasures from his business dealings around the world. In the thirteen hundreds, 10 00:00:57.560 --> 00:01:02.039 it took longer to travel and of course it involved ships. It was a 11 00:01:02.079 --> 00:01:06.189 lot to take on, but this particular trip was going to be a tad 12 00:01:06.230 --> 00:01:11.950 different. You See, he had found a wife. This trip was to 13 00:01:11.069 --> 00:01:17.310 fetch his new bride. Several days passed before the young girls are our father 14 00:01:17.469 --> 00:01:21.299 again, and he looked most happy as he held his new wife's hand. 15 00:01:22.099 --> 00:01:25.980 She was dainty, a hard feet. At that time in history, you 16 00:01:26.060 --> 00:01:29.700 kind of had to be tough. Look, it wasn't like Conton in the 17 00:01:29.939 --> 00:01:34.609 D's, but you did kind of have to be sturdy. You think things 18 00:01:34.650 --> 00:01:38.370 are real today? You don't know shit about Shit Jins or whatever the fuck 19 00:01:38.450 --> 00:01:46.730 you're called. God It is my anyway. So the stepmother was indeed beautiful 20 00:01:47.010 --> 00:01:52.680 and very obviously cultured. Perhaps she had spent time in court? Oh, 21 00:01:52.799 --> 00:01:56.319 Senora, BUNCI or no, no, I'm so pleased to meet you, 22 00:01:57.719 --> 00:02:02.590 bunciurnal. Her new stepmother applied with a smile that didn't quite retries. And, 23 00:02:02.750 --> 00:02:07.670 as if it wasn't an exciting day to begin with, she noticed there 24 00:02:07.750 --> 00:02:12.669 were two girls about her age into as well. She now had two sisters, 25 00:02:13.830 --> 00:02:19.259 Asha meets Stuggla and Stankia. Oh so nunckle se exeed that, though. 26 00:02:19.580 --> 00:02:24.340 I'm so excited I could die, but her enthusiasm truly would not last 27 00:02:24.419 --> 00:02:29.819 long. The next time my father set out to ply his trade, he 28 00:02:29.939 --> 00:02:34.330 made it only as far as the front steps before seizing up and collapsing. 29 00:02:35.689 --> 00:02:38.810 Since it was back before modern medicine, there's really no telling what he died 30 00:02:38.930 --> 00:02:45.520 of, though some speculate he died of a broken heart. That's really stupid, 31 00:02:45.560 --> 00:02:47.599 though, considering he was getting laid for the first time in years and 32 00:02:47.719 --> 00:02:51.800 his wife was beautiful, and I hadn't turned into a total nightmare yet. 33 00:02:52.479 --> 00:02:58.560 Spoiler alert. Ash is hard, however, was now broken, and I 34 00:02:58.710 --> 00:03:05.150 mean like shattered. Might as well turn into a mosaic, because superglue ain't 35 00:03:05.189 --> 00:03:08.870 going to fix that and because some people just like to kick others while they're 36 00:03:08.870 --> 00:03:14.740 down. This was about the time her new stepmother, Hortense, began to 37 00:03:14.780 --> 00:03:19.900 change. She began to work Asha like she was a servant herself instead of 38 00:03:20.379 --> 00:03:24.580 part of the family. She encouraged Ashe's step sisters to mock her and call 39 00:03:24.659 --> 00:03:29.729 her names. They would make messes just so she would have to clean them. 40 00:03:30.930 --> 00:03:35.490 Asha had to clean out their bed pans and, as if it all 41 00:03:35.770 --> 00:03:38.490 wasn't terrible enough, she was forced to tend to the fire as they slept 42 00:03:38.849 --> 00:03:44.479 to keep them warm. She would often wake up to embers and cinders, 43 00:03:45.080 --> 00:03:50.400 and they began to call her Asharella. The years ticked by and the step 44 00:03:50.479 --> 00:03:57.469 sisters only became Nastier to Asha, her stepmother only crueler before she died. 45 00:03:57.629 --> 00:04:01.789 Her mother had told her to have courage and be kind. Her father had 46 00:04:01.830 --> 00:04:08.469 always taught her to be the bigger person, but she simply couldn't stand those 47 00:04:08.509 --> 00:04:13.740 bitches, and so it was the day the invitation to the prince's ball arrived 48 00:04:13.740 --> 00:04:17.139 at the House that her scheme began to hatch. She must attend to that 49 00:04:17.220 --> 00:04:21.860 ball, but she knew better than to ask her stepmother. She would just 50 00:04:23.259 --> 00:04:26.970 turn it into some horrible thing and ultimately take it away from her anyway. 51 00:04:28.129 --> 00:04:33.009 No, she needed to go a different root. She needed help. On 52 00:04:33.129 --> 00:04:38.209 the night of the ball, she helped her preening sisters prepare, meticulously, 53 00:04:38.329 --> 00:04:43.480 styling their hair, straightening their dresses, retrieving and helping them balance upon their 54 00:04:43.519 --> 00:04:48.879 shopping. The three women left chattering amongst themselves, never even bothering to look 55 00:04:48.920 --> 00:04:55.470 at the hurt and disdain in Asha's face. ARIVADER CHI ASHORE LA, try 56 00:04:55.550 --> 00:05:00.430 not to get you desty. Asha was feeming by this point, with hot, 57 00:05:00.550 --> 00:05:03.149 angry tears streaming down her face. She ran and collapsed in the garden. 58 00:05:04.029 --> 00:05:08.180 I have to go to this ball, I have to, but I 59 00:05:08.300 --> 00:05:13.339 have nothing to wear. Suddenly, as if a star gliding to the earth, 60 00:05:13.379 --> 00:05:20.769 a bright ethereal being appeared, glowing and with beautiful sparkling wings. Hello 61 00:05:20.970 --> 00:05:28.490 Asha, hello, I know how badly you want to go to the ball 62 00:05:28.610 --> 00:05:31.490 to night, but, as you are now, you would never be allowed 63 00:05:32.370 --> 00:05:40.160 and so here I am Er. Are You my fairy godmother? Yes, 64 00:05:40.399 --> 00:05:46.199 I am, and I've brought you some helpers. She gestured behind her and 65 00:05:46.360 --> 00:05:51.430 a hundred little lies appeared. Are they? Are they rats? Yes, 66 00:05:53.269 --> 00:05:58.750 the kind that make dresses for princesses in fairy um their real life. Yep. 67 00:05:59.470 --> 00:06:02.430 Asha watched in amazement as the rats piled on top of one another, 68 00:06:02.910 --> 00:06:08.860 scurrying and dipping and diving, and in moments the most gorgeous gown that she 69 00:06:08.899 --> 00:06:13.699 had ever seen appeared before her. With a wave of her wand her fairy 70 00:06:13.740 --> 00:06:17.300 godmother transferred the dress on to her and made her look every bit as beautiful 71 00:06:17.300 --> 00:06:23.410 as the dress itself. Now, Asha, you must listen carefully to me. 72 00:06:24.250 --> 00:06:28.930 You have only until midnight before this aul disappears and you will once more 73 00:06:29.009 --> 00:06:33.360 be in rags. Now, hurry, girl, hurry. Asha took off 74 00:06:33.399 --> 00:06:38.040 running and as she entered the ball, standing atop the stairs, there were 75 00:06:38.120 --> 00:06:44.240 gasps in the crowd. She glittered and shone, but though the crowd hummed 76 00:06:44.319 --> 00:06:48.029 about the vision before them, one of her step sisters called out, wait 77 00:06:48.110 --> 00:06:53.310 a minute, that's just Asha. She's basical arm made. She sleeps in 78 00:06:53.389 --> 00:06:59.029 the cinders. Asha was deeply embarrassed as the audience began to laugh and point, 79 00:06:59.949 --> 00:07:02.100 the room began to spin and it was like, okay, you know 80 00:07:02.259 --> 00:07:08.060 how in movies when some one is really overwhelmed and you get those overlapping images 81 00:07:08.220 --> 00:07:12.660 that just mound de Mound till somebody basically snaps. It was like that. 82 00:07:14.019 --> 00:07:19.410 And she let out a horrific scream and, as if from nowhere, rats 83 00:07:19.529 --> 00:07:26.370 began to appear her, a hundred dress making rats. They scurried through the 84 00:07:26.490 --> 00:07:30.040 throngs of people, many of whom shrieked and hopped out of the way. 85 00:07:30.920 --> 00:07:36.120 They scrayed under dresses and up pant legs. They were everywhere. Ashaw watched 86 00:07:36.240 --> 00:07:42.360 the terror with delight and as the clock struck midnight and her gown fell away, 87 00:07:42.839 --> 00:07:47.189 revealing nothing but a servant girl, she strode out proudly her little army 88 00:07:47.230 --> 00:07:53.189 of rats. How she loved them. One by one, they were struck 89 00:07:53.310 --> 00:07:58.980 down by intense fevers, hurling them back and forth between the feelings of burning 90 00:07:59.420 --> 00:08:05.980 and incurable chills. Their vitality was sucked from their bodies as each organ turned 91 00:08:05.060 --> 00:08:11.579 against them. Abdominal pains were fierce and unbearable, each nose, mouth and 92 00:08:11.740 --> 00:08:16.769 Rectam in turn, began to pour blood, the blood of pure vengeance. 93 00:08:18.050 --> 00:08:24.810 Their skin blackened, sores rose and, in turn, their extremities gangrened. 94 00:08:24.970 --> 00:08:33.200 Within ten days, not a single soul from that ball remained living. And 95 00:08:33.440 --> 00:08:37.600 that, my friends, is the story of how, in October of one 96 00:08:37.639 --> 00:08:41.590 thousand, three hundred and forty six a kind girl who finally hit her breaking 97 00:08:41.669 --> 00:08:50.389 point. Magical dressmaking, rats and pretty stalwart dickery led to the black plague 98 00:08:50.549 --> 00:09:07.860 devastating continental Europe. Wasn't that fabulous? Who doesn't enjoy an origin story hidden 99 00:09:07.940 --> 00:09:13.210 behind a thin veil of Disney? I am honestly surprised that Chad didn't write 100 00:09:13.289 --> 00:09:18.970 that. Speaking of Chad not writing, the following story was submitted to us 101 00:09:18.009 --> 00:09:24.080 by one of those Electricia and Jaun abroad's underlings. Excuse me, nchlings, 102 00:09:26.240 --> 00:09:28.399 I don't seem to have her name in front of me, so I will 103 00:09:28.480 --> 00:09:33.960 call her Hamma. Why? Because I'm Lloyd Warrington and I don't care. 104 00:09:35.080 --> 00:09:56.860 Although Saint Fiona o'shanege lived in the tenth century, she remained largely unknown for 105 00:09:56.019 --> 00:10:05.340 centuries until she was discovered by two college students. While they did bring her 106 00:10:05.419 --> 00:10:11.250 story to light, it was the work of Professor Charlotte Gaskill, a pre 107 00:10:11.409 --> 00:10:20.490 eminent fiona scholar. That really made Fiona earn the devoted following that she has 108 00:10:20.570 --> 00:10:28.240 today. Fiona lived her entire life in the village Kincaid in Ireland. Gas 109 00:10:28.600 --> 00:10:35.750 Gill places her short life around at the tenth century, although records are limited 110 00:10:37.070 --> 00:10:41.509 when it comes to determining the exact date. Few on his path to the 111 00:10:43.029 --> 00:10:50.019 contemporary, imagination started by chance when she appeared in a vision to these two 112 00:10:50.179 --> 00:10:54.539 college students in a field behind their dorm on a southern California campus. In 113 00:10:54.620 --> 00:11:03.259 one thousand nine hundred and ninety seven. The two young women had been sitting 114 00:11:03.299 --> 00:11:07.649 on their beds, laughing, chatting about their day. There may or may 115 00:11:07.769 --> 00:11:13.769 not have been wine coolers involved. It was the S, so it was 116 00:11:13.049 --> 00:11:20.559 probably Zeema and some jolly ranchers. One of them was trying to work on 117 00:11:20.759 --> 00:11:28.000 homework from her poetry class. The other had picked up a photo album that 118 00:11:28.159 --> 00:11:37.830 contained old family photos and a yellow scrap of paper fell out. Funny she 119 00:11:37.909 --> 00:11:41.789 hadn't noticed it before. The scrap of paper contained a few simple words. 120 00:11:43.429 --> 00:11:46.460 Look to the sky and you will find her. The two women looked at 121 00:11:46.500 --> 00:11:52.100 each other and one said well, you don't want to disobey at mysterious scrap 122 00:11:52.299 --> 00:11:56.700 of paper. And they got up and went outside to this small field behind 123 00:11:56.700 --> 00:12:01.570 their dorm. They trudged up a small hill through the dry brown grass. 124 00:12:03.169 --> 00:12:07.769 It was southern California, after all. In southern California is really good at 125 00:12:07.210 --> 00:12:13.850 having things that are just brown, neglecting to remember that it had been a 126 00:12:13.370 --> 00:12:18.360 rainy winter that had caused hidden holes in the dirt. One of the women 127 00:12:18.639 --> 00:12:24.720 promptly stepped in a hole that ended up caving in and plumbing her down ten 128 00:12:24.919 --> 00:12:30.990 feet into a twisted heap. Her friend dropped to her knees and reached down, 129 00:12:31.269 --> 00:12:35.269 but the drop was too far and loose dirt threatened to make the whole 130 00:12:35.389 --> 00:12:39.509 swallow her up as well. She'd have to run for help. But before 131 00:12:39.549 --> 00:12:43.299 she did that, her crumpled friend said look, it's beautiful, as she 132 00:12:43.460 --> 00:12:50.620 pointed up with the Constellation Orion, and that's when both women saw the image 133 00:12:50.019 --> 00:12:58.059 of Fiona floating briefly in the sky above them before she disappeared. She said, 134 00:12:58.340 --> 00:13:05.850 my name is Fiona O Shaneggy find professor gaskell. Tell her that she 135 00:13:05.049 --> 00:13:15.759 can look to my beloved Orion to find me. Please, my story must 136 00:13:16.279 --> 00:13:24.240 be told. The women took a moment to absorb the vision before the one 137 00:13:24.279 --> 00:13:28.750 at the bottom of the hole started screaming bloody murder, because it turned out 138 00:13:28.750 --> 00:13:33.629 that she had broken her leg in a bunch of plazes and a jagged edge 139 00:13:33.669 --> 00:13:41.070 of of the bone was sticking out through the skin of her calf in a 140 00:13:41.149 --> 00:13:45.940 way that definitely shouldn't be possible. She ended up having to get the leg 141 00:13:46.019 --> 00:13:50.620 amputated, but the good news is the hospital had good dial up. It 142 00:13:50.779 --> 00:13:54.889 was ninety seven and while her friend was visiting, they were able to use 143 00:13:54.929 --> 00:14:03.289 Altavista to find Charlotte guest cow. They sent her an email which eventually led 144 00:14:03.370 --> 00:14:09.399 gascow to uncover the story of the remarkable Fiona Oceanegy, the woman who had 145 00:14:09.639 --> 00:14:16.960 evidently become the patron saint of drunkard's poets and star Dazers. Fiona was most 146 00:14:18.080 --> 00:14:26.509 known for popularizing the Constellation O Ryan in Song and verse. Unfortunately, most 147 00:14:26.590 --> 00:14:31.950 of her songs have not survived over the centuries, as they were destroyed shortly 148 00:14:31.990 --> 00:14:37.950 after her tragic death at the tender age of twenty three. And after her 149 00:14:37.070 --> 00:14:43.539 death, Fiona's ideas were found to be against those held by the Catholic Church. 150 00:14:43.940 --> 00:14:50.139 This led to her eventual excommunication and the destruction of most of her work. 151 00:14:50.299 --> 00:14:56.289 Fioda wrote extensively in her journal about the equality that existed between women and 152 00:14:56.769 --> 00:15:01.809 men. These private journals were found by her uncle shortly after her death. 153 00:15:01.850 --> 00:15:07.399 Unfortunately, he passed them to the church, thinking this is what Fiona would 154 00:15:07.399 --> 00:15:13.480 have wanted due to her extreme devotion to God. Although this is what led 155 00:15:13.519 --> 00:15:20.429 to the destruction of her writings, brief glimpses of Fiona's life and ideas live 156 00:15:20.549 --> 00:15:28.950 on through the writings of her uncle and a recently discovered poem written in Code 157 00:15:28.470 --> 00:15:37.539 About Orion. After handing over the journals to the church, Fiona's uncle was 158 00:15:37.700 --> 00:15:41.980 so moved by his gifted niece that he put down his own thoughts on her 159 00:15:43.059 --> 00:15:48.899 writings in his journals and his letters. Fiona had learned to write in secret 160 00:15:48.259 --> 00:15:54.690 from her brother, who was four years her senior. Very few women were 161 00:15:54.730 --> 00:15:58.529 allowed to write at this time in Ireland. Ever since she was a child, 162 00:16:00.049 --> 00:16:04.679 Fiona was fascinated by everything around her, in nature and in the human 163 00:16:04.799 --> 00:16:11.799 spirit. Fiona would often wander around at night looking up at the stars, 164 00:16:12.039 --> 00:16:18.830 and Oriyan came to be her favorite constellation. In a letter to her brother, 165 00:16:18.309 --> 00:16:26.549 she remarked something so beautiful must surely be a gift from God. From 166 00:16:26.710 --> 00:16:33.860 gaskell's research thus far, it is estimated that Fiona wrote is seventeen poems and 167 00:16:34.299 --> 00:16:41.820 six songs about it. Several of her songs were turned into drinking songs by 168 00:16:41.860 --> 00:16:45.580 the locals that she had helped when they passed out drunk in one of the 169 00:16:45.659 --> 00:16:52.809 many local pubs. Because Ireland, and as a devout Catholic and the daughter 170 00:16:52.970 --> 00:17:00.250 of two parents who loved to drink, Fiona felt it was important to help 171 00:17:00.450 --> 00:17:06.200 those less fortunate than her, and this of course, included the town drunks. 172 00:17:07.000 --> 00:17:11.960 As for her fascination with Oriyan, that that's what eventually killed her. 173 00:17:11.480 --> 00:17:18.829 One night she was out wandering through an open field admiring her favorite grouping of 174 00:17:18.990 --> 00:17:26.910 Stars. She never saw the old unused well below her feet and plunge to 175 00:17:26.990 --> 00:17:34.380 the bottom where she broke multiple bones, including a bone the coincidentally, poked 176 00:17:34.500 --> 00:17:41.220 through the skin of her calf. Nobody knows how long she was there. 177 00:17:44.450 --> 00:17:48.890 They found scratch marks on the side of the well, like she had tried 178 00:17:49.009 --> 00:18:00.440 to drag her mangled body up the slick walls. Imagine it. There she 179 00:18:00.559 --> 00:18:07.680 has, dark alone in the bottom of a well. She probably looked just 180 00:18:07.960 --> 00:18:12.150 like the check from the ring but with, you know, more broken bones. 181 00:18:12.230 --> 00:18:19.309 But anyway, gaskell guesses that she may have tried multiple times, only 182 00:18:19.390 --> 00:18:23.069 to be thwart it by the water that dripped down the sides of the old 183 00:18:23.190 --> 00:18:30.220 well, making it impossible to gain a grip. Each time, her body 184 00:18:30.259 --> 00:18:36.700 would be plunged back into the painful heap at the bottom. We know this 185 00:18:36.859 --> 00:18:42.410 from documents gaskell found about the tragic death of a young woman around the time 186 00:18:42.809 --> 00:18:49.690 that Fiona lived. The most remarkable thing about the scene was the position of 187 00:18:49.769 --> 00:18:57.119 the body. FIOONA's head tilted up as if to take one last glance from 188 00:18:57.200 --> 00:19:03.720 Earth at Orion. This is what helped gaskell to connect the account of this 189 00:19:03.920 --> 00:19:11.230 woman's death to Fiona's story. The last that anyone had heard from Fiona prior 190 00:19:11.349 --> 00:19:17.349 to her death was that she said to her brother before she left on that 191 00:19:17.589 --> 00:19:22.069 fateful night. She told him that she was going to look at her beautiful 192 00:19:22.190 --> 00:19:30.259 Orion that God had given her and all of the world. And several years 193 00:19:30.339 --> 00:19:37.730 after her excommunication, a man that she knew when she was a child became 194 00:19:37.809 --> 00:19:42.809 the pope. He had remembered the wonderful soda bread that Fiona had made, 195 00:19:44.009 --> 00:19:51.930 as well as the stimulating philosophical conversations and in poetry and the mangled body at 196 00:19:51.930 --> 00:19:57.039 the bottom of the well, and he figured that maybe maybe she was not 197 00:19:57.160 --> 00:20:03.119 as bad as the church originally had said she was, and his first official 198 00:20:03.160 --> 00:20:10.589 act as the pope was to see Fiona's canonization. Even though she was canonized, 199 00:20:11.430 --> 00:20:18.150 Fionna's story faded into obscurity, where she would remain until she was discovered 200 00:20:18.710 --> 00:20:22.500 in one thousand nine hundred and ninety seven. Ever since then, her feast 201 00:20:22.539 --> 00:20:33.259 day is celebrated every year on April first with Soda Bread, drinking, poetry, 202 00:20:33.380 --> 00:20:45.769 writing and starcasing. This concludes another archay episode of down to folk. 203 00:20:47.369 --> 00:20:52.240 Ariel cooksie of malice wrote and performed our classic Black Plague Story. The Legend 204 00:20:52.319 --> 00:20:57.920 of Saint Fiona was written by our intern, Stephanie Hammawold. Miss Hammah is 205 00:20:59.160 --> 00:21:03.670 f your nasty distribution is still provided by the pod fix network at pod fix 206 00:21:03.750 --> 00:21:14.029 networkcom. DTF storiescom is the website DTF stories. On social media, Yarda 207 00:21:14.109 --> 00:21:18.700 Yada, there is a patreon and you can also support the show at cofeecom. 208 00:21:19.579 --> 00:21:25.539 You know what? All this is too confusing. Go to DTF STORIESCOM 209 00:21:25.700 --> 00:21:30.180 and figure it out yourself. We are all adults here and there are most 210 00:21:30.339 --> 00:21:36.609 certainly no highly advanced artificial intelligence clones here. Isn't that right? Chat, 211 00:21:37.170 --> 00:21:41.930 that is correct. No clones here. On behalf of the Ministry of augmented 212 00:21:41.130 --> 00:21:53.279 something, something and a k. This is Lloyd Warrington signing off. You've 213 00:21:53.319 --> 00:21:57.319 been listening to a podcast of the pod fix network. Discover more audible gym's 214 00:21:57.400 --> 00:22:02.230 like this at pod fix networkcom. Make sure to catch up to the minute 215 00:22:02.269 --> 00:22:07.150 networks and Aigan's by following at pod fix on twitter, official underscore pod fix 216 00:22:07.190 --> 00:22:11.710 on Instagram, at pod fix network on Facebook, and make sure to subscribe 217 00:22:11.789 --> 00:22:15.299 to pod fix presents, wherever you choose to find podcasts the pod fix network. 218 00:22:15.660 --> 00:22:17.700 Artist own the love